Monday, 23 November 2009 {}
Yoz, I'm here to rant and complain about life again. Went through here and realised how fast something can just change. Would you all understand me? Do you all know what I'm trying to get at and do?
I hate my bad points, why must it be being unable to make decisions, taking things for granted and being so forgiving? Why can't they be being heartless, with the hack care attitude and never ever think about how others wil feel?
Cause I'm feeling utterly down now being unable to make decisions. I freaking cannot make up my mind for anything! At one point when i decide something, I fear for the one that I'm letting go of and then I'll get back at the same state of confusion of what to do.
I'm so afraid to lose, I dont want to! Yet I'm guilty for not keeping to what I said before though knowing you wouldnt blame me. If only I can have the abilities of Edward Cullen and know whats going on on that mind of yours. Cause I can't get anything! One minute you're still there, the other minute you make me feel like you;re totally gone. Why am i holding back? Why can't I make up my mind? why!
I don't want to hurt anyone, I really don't! Then why am I still doing this knowing someone might get hurt? Can someone guide me through this moment where I'm totally lost and not knowing where to go next?
I cannot resist the temptation of my fingers running through my keypad then hoping for your reply though roughly knowing the truth already. I'm dizzy from thinking about all this, I really am... But why? Why can;t I stop this why!
Friends never look like friends. I've never knew any of my friends in any way. H, you dont trust me at all. You lied to me, I'm so disappointed in you.. Why all this war going on when we can have peace? WHY WHY WHY?! Would someone please answer these questions for me? D: